Iowahawk is hilarious once again.

By Michael Hodges, Time Out London

Islam — it’s the capital’s hottest lifestyle trend! A growing religion, based on noble traditions and compassionate principles, yet infidels sometimes get the wrong impression because of ignorance and misunderstanding and the occasional subway bomb. Here Time Out argues that an Islamic London would be ab fab!

The expectant crowd ululates as the open-backed lorry drives slowly around the Picadilly Circus – known since the Islamic revolution of 2021 as The Mohammad Sidique Khan Roundabout – nudges its way through the thousands gathered. The loudspeakers blare: “Good news! By order of Sultan Charles, Islamic RAF bombers have finally destroyed the criminal Zionist entity!” The lorry spills a load of Cadbury bars in the street and the celebration erupts, with cheers of ‘Allahu akbar’ …

Farfetched? According to current demographic trends, this sweets-filled celebration is only part of the fun awaiting future Londoners with Islam becoming the hottest trend to hit the city since Beatlemania. Unfortunately, like the rock ‘n’ roll Teddy Boys of the 50’s, the scootering Mods of the 60’s, and the safety pinned-Punks of 70’s, London’s cutting-edge Islamic fashionistas are causing panic and hysteria among uptight Tory squares. Loosen up daddy-o, it’s time to set the record straight about Britain’s Fab Four Million!