People will something to sell, that’s who. $161 billion a year’s worth.

My son was married yesterday and he and his wife didn’t break the bank doing it. There was a church ceremony, good food at a Thai restaurant and that was that. My wife and daughter made the wedding cakes and I shot the photos with help from friends. Very little was “outsourced” to professionals.

Something tells me they’re going to do all right. But their approach is becoming the exception.

The marketing of the wedding as a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to be close to heaven — or at least close to celebrity — is explored in “One Perfect Day: The Selling of the American Wedding,” by New Yorker writer Rebecca Mead.

The book is a must-read for future brides and grooms who want to honor the day without getting caught up in the escalating production values promoted by the industry.

“An American wedding is a testament to the enduring desire to have things that seem meaningful and make a statement of commitment,” Mead says. “People want to know how to get married, and the people most readily available to tell them are the people selling the stuff to do it. There are cultural forces that encourage ‘bridezilla’ behavior.”

Wanting the Best, Spending the Most

Those forces begin with “norms” touted by the media. Consider that the much-publicized cost of the average wedding — $28,000 — comes from a study conducted by Conde Nast Bridal Group, publisher of three wedding magazines and a web site. The study’s respondents are those who had answered an online survey, responded to a magazine promotion, or attended a bridal show. Not exactly the population of brides at large.

“If a bride has been told, repeatedly, that it costs nearly $28,000 to have a wedding, then she starts to think that spending $28,000 on a wedding is just one of those things a person has to do, like writing a rent check every month,” Mead writes.

Mead looks behind the wedding-industrial complex, including the Chinese seamstress who earns 40 cents for sewing the skirt on a $1,000 gown; the Cinderella coach and other trappings of Disney’s “Fairy Tale Wedding Department”; and the videographer who encourages peers at an industry conference to double their prices, because “parents want the best for their children.”

Those are the same parents who shell out $10 for their kids birthday parties. Let ‘em eat cake!