Scrappleface:

With the success of last week’s simulated news conference on the California wildfires by the Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA), mid-level bureaucrats at the disaster-relief agency have reportedly initiated plans to stage “natural” disasters as well.

The imitation news briefing, which featured FEMA employees pretending to be genuine journalists, was “just a test run for the more ambitious pilot program of engineered catastrophes designed to help even out the work flow during the year,” according to one unnamed source inside the agency.

“Due to the unreliable nature of floods, wildfires, tornadoes and blizzards,” the source said, “FEMA employees have a lot of down time, during which there’s little else to do but post notes about their boredom on Facebook or Twitter, and of course, to manufacture realistic-looking PR events. When we start creating these centrally-planned natural tragedies on a quarterly basis, it will help to keep their minds engaged, and ultimately, will result in a more experienced crew to deal with the aftermath of unpredictable freelance disasters.”